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The Fog, the Haze and Daze

I was chatting with a customer last week about Fibromyalgia... not a common topic for me to discuss but it came up because his daughter failed the disability questionnaire  as I always do and so I threw the fact out there.  I know how annoying it is to not get coverage because of a pre-existing disability and in my case it is rather funny because it is the migraines that make me miss work, not the fibro.  He told me a co-worker has FMS and that he had been on strong pain killers for year but was tired to the haze it caused in his thinking and memory so he took some time off to ween off them.  When I thought about it afterwards I had to wonder why they gave that fellow opiates for FMS, as they had also given my father.  I had never been offered any pain control.  Was it because of the field they worked in?  Or because they could communicate how much pain they were in better than I can?  I simply don't know but I don't think those of us with FMS should be put on pain killers.  Pain is in the brain not the flesh, more so with FMS... so treatments like Lyrica combined with things like massage therapy seem more prudent.

Then I thought about that man and the fact the drug haze was problematic for him.  Those of us with fibro have memory problems, concentration problems and the fibro fog which is like a thick, trance-like state where nothing gets in.  We have to find interesting and creative ways just to get around that in the work place.  I have troubles with it quite a lot, especially with the migraines mixed in.  It makes it such that I am better at looking at the big picture but I miss all the details... which leads to a lot of little errors.  I often feel like I am losing time because I cannot remember anything very well and can't remember how long ago something happened, if I remember it happening at all.  Pain makes it hard to get things processed into the long term memory because we are focused on ignoring the pain while trying to do other tasks, so a lot of the details are also ignored.

Naturally this made me wonder about all the medications I am on... so very many of all different types and also quite a few days with painkillers (tramacet is my rescue med for migraines).  And if I took all those drugs away, assuming this did not cause me to revert to daily migraines, would my mind seem more clear?  Would the haze lift?  I know days without migraines are awesome in their clarity, although far too rare, and I imagine if I did not get migraines that would me my natural state.  But maybe those drugs make it worse.  The antidepressant I am taking to help me sleep makes me feel extremely drugged at night and groggy in the morning, so that one does most definitely contribute to the daze.  It is amazing what side effects and compromises we make to lessen our pain.  The idea is not to take something very strong to obliterate the pain but make it difficult to function... it is to find something that lessens the pain so that you can function.  I wonder what it would be like to not be on any of these meds.  I know the pain would be unbearable, as it was before I was on any preventative, but still, what happened to the days when I was only on one preventative instead of three?

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