Everything happens for a reason

There are things people with chronic pain and illness hate to hear.  Like 'no pain no gain' because we know pain comes with no gain.  Or 'what does not kill you makes you stronger' and this is kinda true in the sense we are all stronger in our broken places but we have to be reminded that indeed it does not kill us and it makes us stronger in very unhelpful ways.  There there is 'but you don't look sick' which really is a huge bias people seem to have that suggests when you are chronically ill you should be miserable and behave as people expect the chronically ill.

But the saying I hate by far is 'everything happens for a reason'.  It annoys me to no end because people say this to suggest our personal suffering is for a reason that we might not comprehend.  Sure everything happens for a reason and that reason is entirely random and has no actual meaning.  I was not put on this earth to suffer even if all evidence suggests that.  I really doubt there is some grand design to my suffering but if there is, if there is some 'reason' for all this then that even pisses me off more quite frankly.  Nevertheless it does bring to mind the idea of karma.  I don't think karma has any effect in this life for no matter how much good vibes you project or do it does not come back to you, and the self-serving idiots out there tend to win in the end.  And if suffering all this pain in this life is supposed to teach me something, then I totally miss the message which suggests I will have to repeat this in the next life... and if that is not hell then I don't know what is.  Conversely, perhaps I was a horrifically evil person in a past life and this chronic pained existence is my punishment.  So when I hear someone say everything happens for a reason I really want to give them a reason to 'get' what I live.
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