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Down to the wire

Well my potential return date to work is Oct 14th. So... I hope that neuro fills out my extension because with him changing up my meds like he is I need time.

As recommended I have not been using my tramacet. Which as you might suspect means on the days where I am not using my triptan the migraine is rather unpleasant and enduring. Nothing new in that and since usually painkillers would be most beneficial to get me through work it is easier than usual, but unfortunately when the migraine works its way to acute by bedtime I do have a bit of a problem. A migraine around a 6 or even a 7 taken with a sleeping pill, the sleeping I use sort of dulls the pain a little bit and this helps me sleep just as much as the sleeping pill itself really. But when the pain is at an 8, less so and if it is a 9 or worse, then the sleeping has no dulling effect and unfortunately no effect at all because I'm in too much pain to settle down and sleep. Leads to a lot of insomnia, which when I was working led to sleep deprivation, sleep paralysis and those wicked stretches of daily acute migraines I seem to have started just tempering. What I was doing was taking a painkiller in the evening to bring the pain down a bit first to help me get to sleep when I take my sleeping pill and indeed it was helping me moderate my sleeping cycle a little. Lets just say I'm back at square one. So sleep is going to be a challenge.

So far since I got control of my neck pain before the neuro appointment I have been managing it well. It came back, because of the lack of sleep, and unmanaged migraines... but not badly yet because I'm being careful to manage it. As a result I have had little to no migraines in the morning which is my normal, glad to have at least gotten that stabilized (at least until the sleep thing buggers up again) and this means the migraines usually hit in the early afternoon. I do get morning migraines, when I don't get enough sleep or it is hormonally triggered or if it is in fact a continuation of the previous migraine. But limiting those is the best thing to do, so I have some time to exercise and do things.

I've weeded out my verapamil. And joy for joy it seems to have buggered up my vertigo and my 'normal' migraine aura. My normal migraine aura was diminished by my previous neuros treatment and now, well, wow its coming back in a flashy way. And the vertigo is destabilizing me. I almost fell down. Like really almost fell down from just standing still doing nothing. One minute I was standing, the next I was falling. So... good time to be adding the topamax upping.... but I think I have to email him about that and set up a doctors appointment to get that going.

And I have very little time for these insurance people to make a choice. And if that choice is for me to return... well, hell, he told me not to drive with vertigo so not sure what I'm supposed to do about that. Fly? Walk?
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The crowded me out of the brain. Making no room for anything else. Distraction was impossible. You feel almost frantic with the pain but must be still.

What do you do? To get through it when you have no distraction?

I ask me this as I am really in the depths of a 9 level frantic level of pain right now. Hoping maybe some writing will be a distraction, but it isn't. As I said, the pain crowds the brain. I have to focus real hard to write and my head isn't clear. Too much pain to focus well. Things become quite difficult to do. 

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