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October 2012 Headache & Migraine Disease Blog Carnival: Venting About Migraine

Venting About Migraine Disease: How do you vent your frustrations about living with migraine disease in a way that's helpful to your healing, both emotionally and physically?"

No one can argue that we need to vent once in a while. Get our rant on. I have done it on numerous occasions. We need to because we are under a great deal of strain emotionally and mentally. Holding that inside all the time with no outlet is never a good thing.

Primarily I vent here on my blog. It is a safe place for me. I feel like anyone who reads it chooses to do so and therefore either has migraine, or chronic pain, and therefore can relate to why I am venting. I also vent here because people who might not understand do not know of this place or see it or read it and so I don't feel judged for my honesty. I can get it out of my system. Put it into words. Make it all make sense in my mind. And it makes me feel better to have done so.

I also vent on migraine forums and groups of Facebook because sometimes I want to vent about something specific that other people with the same condition might also have experienced and I just want that support. Just a little support from others who are struggling the same way, who have the same issues, who deal with the same stigma is makes me feel stronger for it. Like we as a group as a whole can get through this.

Currently I also vent with my psychologist because recently for the last few years the Realness of pain has become difficult to think about let alone talk about. It causes me anxiety and distress when I talk about it. Because when I talk about how real my struggle is, well, that is behind the facade and it brings out the emotions behind the facade. And I am always overwhelmed with emotions when I do... because the fact is I am barely surviving and I don't like to face that reality let alone talk about it. So I realized I really should see someone about the fact that I am really not holding my cool very well lately, if that much emotional distress is right under the surface. And I have anxiety about returning to work now that I'm on leave. Again I feel safe telling her anything. Things that would distress others to hear but are normal for people with chronic migraines to think and feel. It is important to my healing that I handle my emotional and mental wellbeing.

We have to talk about all this stuff that bothers us. It is the only way we can manage it and cope better with the pain. We have to get it out in any way that makes us comfortable or in more ways than one if we want. Because if you are like me we don't feel comfortable venting to loved ones because we don't want them to worry, we don't want them to know how much we suffer or how we suffer or the problems we have with coping. Not that we can't do that as well with loved ones we can talk to, because I do that as well. For example my mom reads my blog and I like that she does because then she knows how I really feel... that insight on what is going on in my head that I don't necessarily always say. I think that's great and then we talk later. Communication like that is good. But with my spouse he gets distressed when I 'get real' with him because it worries him that I suffer so much... it means I might not be coping well, and that I might try to commit suicide again, and that scares him to death... so he would prefer to think I'm doing fine mentally and emotionally if not physically. There is only so much realness I want to inflict on him. And when it comes to work situations and so forth... obviously we need to vent about that... the amount of stress, stigma and cruelty that can happen in a workplace when you have a disability is quite vent worthy. And we can vent in a message board or to a therapist and get productive advice on what to do about that situation.

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