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Showing posts from February, 2012

Chronic pain and Significant Others

Migraine and Spouses - Actually you can take this and apply this to all chronic illnesses.

"If you suffered Migraine before you were married as much as you do now, do you think your spouse would have stuck by your side?
One of the worst and best things a headache specialist/neurologist ever told me was something like this:
“Do you know how incredibly lucky you are that your husband has stuck by your side through all of this? Most marriages could never survive everything yours has withstood.”
It was the best because it reminded me how much my family loves me.
It was the worst because it reminded me that I have put my family through so much, that it becomes not a normal fact, but an astonishing fact that they are still with me. This thought makes me sick to my stomach." - migraine.com

How many times have we come accross accounts of spouses who have not been understanding and who have not stood by their spouse or significant other.  And, by the way, I should be using the term '…

Eventually we wonder... why don't these treatments work?

Why Treatment Isn't Working Study - I had to post about this little article because honestly it does occur to us after awhile.  With all the medications out there, for those of us who have tried and tried and tried... why do we not find that successful combo?  What is it that is complicating the situation?  One thing the study brought up would be the most obvious... high frequency of attacks.  It is simply harder to treat them when they are that frequent and I think the brain just gets wired for all the activity frankly and hieghtened for the triggers, so high frequency is definetely an indication there will be problems with treatment.  Having migraine before the age of twenty years old is another sign and again that might just show how the brain becomes hard hired for it, expecially since it is still developing until 21.

Then of course the co-existing conditions... sleeping problems and such things as fibromyalgia.  That would be me on both counts there.  Yes, my migraines are ex…

Acutely chronic

On the form my doc had to sign for my employer, because my employer like to be asshats sometimes, at the very top it has these boxes to check off whether the patient has a temporary, chronic or acute condition.  And my doc said well 'you have a chronic and an acute condition'.  That is precisely the point right there.  Because people, employer specifically, assume chronic means you will always have it, it will always be the same, therefore you must deal with it and should never miss work for it.  Which is wrong on so many levels.  That being said chronic conditions can be manageable, like my Fibromyalgia is.  My employer has never had me call in sick from FMS.  It is a chronic pain condition, it is an invisible disability, and yet, I never call in sick for it.  I had a flare up where I had troubles walking for a year and yet I came in every day, walking in a shuffling slow pace, but there without complaint.  There was a year I slept with wrist braces on both my wrists and wore…

Topamax aren't you a fun one?

I am still tapering up on my dosage.  At 50 mg now and on to 75 mg for a month then 100mg for a month.  I will be keep a detailed migraine diary so I know whether it is working or it is just wishful thinking on my part.

That being said so far the side effects are interesting.  The tingling is weird, sort of spontaneous tingling in random places.  It concerns me only because of course the tingling, then numbness of the permanent nerve damage I got from the status migraine, makes me worry that I might happen again.  I also get the case of the stupids a bit but not so bad, not as bad as I get with a migraine... hell, today's migraine made me write 3 instead of S all day and J instead of F and then just garbled some words right up.  So forgetting what I was saying or doing for a few minutes... minor.  The worst has been the fatigue and sleepiness.  I have been just so insanely tired all day long.  I don't get any better quality of sleep at night, but all day long I have to fight t…

The Haze has lifted....

I had a profound realization, like the puzzle pieces just snapped together, all because I have had just, just enough a decrease in pain to actually be able to think clearly about the reality of my fate.  I know the facts, and have always known the facts, but knowing the facts and being able to think clearly about them is something entirely different.  Lets put this in perspective by giving a flashback to 2010...

2010... I was in survival mode.  In constant pain.  Migraines every day.  Just like the year before, just like the year after.  I was getting a lot of pressure from my employer about my absences from work due to my migraines.  Treatment was just non effective.  My neuro appointment was in the distant future.  I could not have another leave of absence, or at least I could, but if I did, I knew I would be demoted and my workplace would likely become more hostile to me and I could not endure that.  I was desperate to power through to my next neuro appointment hoping for... someth…

Can't escape the Monster

What I hate about hormonal migraines is that they are impossible to treat, and I think one reason most of my preventative protocols seem to be ineffective is that the stats are skewed for a week and a half out of every month... minimum.  And if that month happens to have more triggers then that span of time is stretched out.  This hormonal trigger cycle started from my last post... that abrupt migraine last week at 4am on Wednesday and has not stopped kicking yet.  It is a nasty one for sure and I have been trying to just roll with the punches but with getting used to this new med concoction it has been tricky.  I have been a bit drugged up in the mornings... with a lot of visual echoes going on, you know where you get all those trailers after everything?  Trippy.  And tripping, into everything.  And the pain is seriously compramising my cool.  The skin on my head is so damned painful right now.  And breathing hurts.  And air touching my skin hurts.  And being awake hurts.  You get th…