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Showing posts from July, 2012

That socializing thing and the Migraine Zone

I'm just going to call the week-ish of hormonal migraine hell the Migraine Zone... for me the Migraine Zone is:

a Zone... as in it has its own damn time zone and area code. It does not play by the rules of 'regular' migraines, if I can even say that when I get daily migraines. The reason I can say that I suppose is because the zone has a beginning and an end, but is days of one migraine... not a migraine a day. Totally different story.Ditzy, dizzy, dumbass... a haze comes down on me and my brain shuts down. I fumble and mumble and stumble. Words fail me. My perceptions begin to get all Alice in Wonderland. Why is that wall moving? Did the floor just fall or the world tilt?And the pain, well the pain peaks and just stays there. It doesn't really matter much what I do about it. Sometimes whatever poison I choose will dim it a wee bit but never long.Sleep? Who needs sleep? Apparently it is a no sleep zone. Too much pain I suppose makes it less sleep likely. And the vertig…

Nothing But The Water (I) - Grace Potter & The Nocturnals

The Open Pain Journal study on D-Ribose benefit for Fibromyalgia

The Open Pain Journal study on D-Ribose benefit for Fibromyalgia  I have honestly never heard of D-ribose at all or referenced for treatment of ME and FM.... but I guess there was a study done in 2006, a small study mind you, that suggested it was benificial and now a new study recently that supports those findings. Now this is a substance we naturally make and used as a supplament by athletes and in genetics disorders where these is a deficiency in energy production. After reading through the study I can see why researchers looked into it for FM and ME because I had heard there were low numbers in ATP production with the conditions and apparently D-ribose helps with that.  The findings are quite good and certainly intriguing.

Head shrinkery

So I'm randomly phoning shrinks (a term i use because psychologist apparently gets stuck on my migraine addled brain... and I like the term... it reminds me of those little shrunken heads) because I think its a good idea to attempt to take care of my emotional health in some fashion. Good days are good days, but bad pain days... well. they are just bad. And I figure it will make things easier to have someone to talk to who won't freak out. In the sense that chronic pain can be traumatic emotionally and volatile  Not always, but sometimes. And I think talking about it to people who don't get that scares the crap out of them. I know it scares my spouse. I think he worries a great deal when I say anything too serious about how much I am suffering such that I feel that I can't truly have an honest discussion about it with him because I don't want to scare him.

I don't know. Being in a great deal of pain is like being in the middle of the ocean trying to swim to a …

Reality is really trippy

I'm going to say I'm thinking these thoughts I'm going to express because I have a wicked migraine right now with a wicked trippy visual aura. Kind of annoying really because the vertigo keeps tilting things periodically, but that aside, I'm going to get philosophical on you all.

Rene Descartes (and, yes, I wrote an article on this because that's how I roll) said we have to doubt our senses because we could be dreaming. It was his concept of radical doubt... if it could be doubted it should be doubted. So if I could be dreaming right now, then how can I know that what I sense to be true (feel. see. whatever) is true. I used to actually think he rather had a point except that with fibromyalgia and my extremely bad, unrefreshing sleep... I always know that I am dreaming.  I lucid dream a lot.  Because I really don't sleep well. I'm sort of floating in and out of sleep. So I dream and become rapidly aware I am dreaming. I'll be in a dream and just think …

Do any of us remember this?

Venting and journal writing and the price of suffering

Before I began to blog a lot I used to write in a journal frequently.  Just to vent mostly. I found writing your emotions clears them from your mind a bit so you don't dwell on them as much.  And I like to write things down because I can then look back and say 'Oh right that is when that symptom started' which I often do with this blog actually. I lose a lot of Time to pain. When I'm getting daily migraines honestly not very much gets stored in my long term memory. I don't remember events very well. The details are very vague. The timing is also vague; the event could have been six months ago or two years ago but I couldn't tell you. I don't remember people very well. In my job this is difficult because I meet a customer and the next day I forget what they look like, even after dealing with them for weeks. I just don't seem to have very good facial recognition.  And when it comes to my health the intensity of things sometimes gets blurred over time. I m…

Motion sickness and migraines

Both migraine and motion sickness may be due to low brain levels of serotonin "Scientists believe that low levels of a brain chemical called serotonin may make people susceptible to developing migraine headaches. Many people with migraine also have a problem with motion sickness, but it is not clear why this might be. We know that many drugs to treat motion sickness increase brain levels of serotonin, an important brain chemical. It is possible that low brain levels of serotonin may also be responsible for motion sickness. In this issue of Neurology,1 Drummond reports on a study that evaluated whether low brain levels of serotonin trigger motion sickness in people with and without migraine."

The connection is not news to me. Actually it is really an annoying thing right now given the whole vertigo thing, which apparently actually comes with it some motion sickness as well. There was also a study …

offically on leave

I'm on leave until October 14th, since they wanted to put me on leave until I see the new neuro so that's good news.  I don't have to worry until then.

I managed to do some housework today.  Cleaned the kitchen floor and the fridge. Combine that with the yoga yesterday and I feel like someone beat me with a stick... but that should go away if I keep up with the yoga. Er. Hopefully.

It was a bad migraine day though. So I couldn't do much until I slept a bit and tried to manage the pain.

Still got some housework done and even got one of my FM articles wrote... which I will dicuss tommorow, so not to bad productivity wise.  And that makes me feel good really.  Lessens the guilt from not working I guess you could say.

The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places

First little poster thingy I have ever created... it's based on my favorite quote by Ernest Hemingway... at least this part of the quote.  The first time I heard it is just made me feel stronger.  Yeah we are broken... but we are stronger in our broken places.  Because we survive.

A Good day

My day went well today. I took my Uber sleeping pill combo so I could sleep off a nasty migraine.  I slept in as a result and woke up groggy as hell, but not a problem if you don't have to get up for work.  And there was no migraine.

My mom came for a brief visit which made me feel good. I'm thinking we should set up times to do things together to get me out of the house to ensure I don't become a recluse.  Because I think it would be good to spend some time with her as well.

When she left I realized I was beginning to feel awake and I still didn't have a migraine so I  got the Wii up and running to begin slowly on some exercise.  Something I am capable of doing when I am not working. So I started it up and since the last time I used it last year I've lost 22 pounds. I figure from the Topamax, even though that seems a lot.  Crazy eh? I knew it was a lot, but I didn't think it was that much. It had started slow though, so it was hard to tell.  Anyway from there …

Agoraphobia, anxiety and fear

I wonder today if someone can develop Agoraphobia due to fear of leaving the house because every time you do it makes the migraine you have way worse or triggers one rather quickly. Plus a general fear of sun light. Is there a phobia for sunlight? There should be. Anyway since I am currently not working, for whatever duration, it is not necessary to leave the house and when I do I really regret it... I already was a hermit so the next step really is Agoraphobia. I actually had a shrink say I was devloping it last time I was on a short term leave. Maybe she was right, but maybe it's just general pain avoidance. After all its not fear and anxiety, it is just knowing triggers... whereas working, now that is begining to cause fear and anxiety. Nevertheless I ought to brave the outdoors occasionally because pain avoidance can unfortunately be habit forming, for good reason, but nonetheless.  Not so much for the migraines because they are consistently evil and lately very severe expecia…

It took a lot of effort to get to the pharmacy today...

... and yet I forgot to bring my brain. It is not too difficult to remember my essential medications, given I was out of both my triptans and painkillers and had a migraine... so that there was incentive to go to the pharmacy.  I definitely remembered to get them.  However, I ran out of my script for my nausea med awhile back and hadn't filled it. Reason being the nausea I was getting which was indeed horrific was caused by the severe vertigo so I was taking the SERC and then when that was hurting my stomach I just resorted to motion sickness pills to just help me keep food down. I don't like to take the anti-nausea pills too often because they make me... edgy and frankly uncomfortable in my skin. So I just don't unless necessary, but with the vertigo being as it is and not necessarily wanting to take the SERC all the time either I want to have it on hand.  Unfortunately i forgot the name of it... which is really easy to do when it isn't one of the essential, necessar…

'Pretend disabled really are sick' article... made me throw us a little in my mouth

I saw this on Facebook and I had to post about it because it really pissed me off.  This quote here where he says he would like to fake a disability like "one of those newly invented illnesses which make you a bit peaky for decades - fibromyalgia or M.E."  Link to article about how idiotic this dude is

Seriously WTF? The name fibromyalgia was made in 1976 not the freaking condition which went by other names prior. Do your research idiot. And invented?  Sure there is no blood test, sure it is hard to diagnos... but there is evidence... "There is decreased blood flow to areas of the brain; the thalamus section, which might explain pain sensitivity and cognitive functioning issues. There is high levels of “substance P,” a central nervous system neurotransmitter involved in pain processing. In other words, we are wired to feel pain faster, longer and that signal just keeps on going. There is also a hormone that promotes muscle growth that we are low in, somatomedin C. Low …

Headache balm I like

Pureliving- Lavender&Chamomile Tension spot relief - I really like this stuff.  Which is sort of weird since I loath lavender... maybe it is the chamomile or whatever else in there, but I don't really smell the lavender.  I like it for migraines really.  I rub it on my forehead, temples, down my jaw a bit and behind my ears and down my neck.  I also use some stronger ones, but this one is quite nice, especially at night.  I've only gotten it as a gift so this is the first time I've gone to there site but they also have lots of other products in this line and others for aromatherapy.... but it is not so much the aromatherapy I like, although I bet it helps, it is just the way it makes the muscles feel I guess.  Like other headache balms really, but just a tad milder and more soothing.

Hazy heat wave foggy migraine blah

I wasn't going to use that additional sleep pill enhancer medication during the work week due to the extreme morning grogginess factor... but it suddenly got really hot around here and if I couldn't sleep before i sure as hell wouldn't be able to now.  So it was worth the risk and has been definitely since I have actually been able to sleep.  The ER trip, while not fun and rather expectantly physically draining for a few days, did boot me out of my pain cycle... sort of.  With some good sleep I'm back to not having migraines in the morning and getting them in the mid-afternoon.  Unfortunately they really kick it up on the pain scale riding the heat wave home.  And it is just damn draining melting in the hot house.  However, I have been taking my triptan as soon as I get home and that tames the pain a bit which then helps me sleep.  So sort of managing it.  Kind of sort of.  Best I can sort of.  Well, what can I say?  It is what it is right?  At least I am not taking to…

Sunday at the ER... cause that's how I roll

Yes, that's how I like to spend my Sundays, how about you? No? Well, me neither. But it needed to be done. My doc wanted me to go in do I could get some Maxeran in me, which is an anti-nausea med but he says has interesting properties to help break a pain cycle. Skeptical? I am. Mostly because this pain cycle has been insane in the brain, but I said I'd go and go I went. I regret not going on Saturday because then I could have recovered from the ER visit on Sunday, but that’s hindsight for you. Besides Saturday started out as a low pain day and I thought that meant I could manage the pain without medications and maybe that would coast me out of this nasty streak... but I was very, very wrong... the acute migraine kicked in in the evening with a vengeance.

So when I got up at 10am off I went. Even though the migraine was not bad yet. But stepping outside into the hot damned sunny day made it worse and then waiting into ER worse yet. So I guess just throw me a trigger or two a…

Overview of Fibromyalgia and sleep dysfunction

Overview of Fibromyalgia and sleep dysfunction

Guess where the inspiration for this article came from?  Yeah, that's right... lots and lots of counting sheep.  I mean with FM insomnia is a very bit deal.  In fact with me I'd say it was my first symptom, so when there was that theory FM is in fact a sleeping disorder I thought that made sense... but whether it is or isn't sleep dysfunction is a huge part of the picture.  Right now mine sucks because of migraine pain intensity... but pain intensity is one reason why we can't sleep, so there you go.  With FM, and with migraines (cause lack of sleep is a Huge migraine trigger) we can't sleep cause of the pain, and lack of sleep increases the pain.... and there you go.  But with FM insomnia is quite a bit more complicated than that unfortunately.

I feel like a poor me moment... but I'll resist the temptation

It has been a craptastic week, I'll admit that.  Three missed work days in a row is actually a record for me, but I think those fantastic sleeping pills might have something to do with that.  They work a little too well.  And waking up, well, not really waking up and being in pain seems to create a sort of non-willpower vortex I can't resist.  And I find that really, really depressing.  So I spent most of the day in a bit of a mood funk.  Which I don't like because pain and lowered moods are frankly rather dangerous.  Or they have the potential to be, at least they do for me.  I appriciate my doctor trying to assist me with tweaking my medication but it seems to have had the opposite effect, side effects suck and unfortunately while decreasing my Topamax has stopped those wierd nightime seizures (as far as I know) it has also increased my migraines... a lot.  Thusly the craptastic week, a lot of sleep deprivation until I got the uber strong sleeping pill enhancer and then …

Hormonal Migraine info

My mom forwarded this link to me on hormonal migraines (menstrual migraines) that I found interesting because it lays out treatments that I have not heard of and some I had. National Headache Foundation: Menstrual Migraine I'd heard of taking NSAIDs for the duration to help prevent and treat and for a bit that is what I did back when I was able to take them... but those meds eat your stomach to hell.  Or maybe it was just what I was on, or just that I have IBS because of FM that makes my digestive system a little more finicky, either way, that is a no go for me.  I had not heard of taking magnesium preventatively, but I know it is good for migraines... as I mentioned a bit back it can be difficult to find the right magnesium to take if you have digestive compaints and I have been having problems with that, but it is definately a good idea to do so.  Also had not heard DHE referenced in regards to hormonal migraines... the only triptan I remember doctors mention was good for hormo…

Just when you feel things could get good they just get bad

There was a time a few months back when I felt I was potentially getting to the point of getting down to the 15 migraines a month.  That may sound rather sucky but daily is far worse.  I was put on Topamax in addition to my other preventatives in January and I was beginning to get migraine free days mixed in there randomly for no reason other than to mock me I suppose but there was also a decrease in some migraine intensity.  Hard to say for sure, but it seemed like the intensity was diminished because I found myself using less triptans... I usually hold off on using triptans because if I can only use them three times a week I want it to be for a damn acute one not a moderate one.

Then I started getting some problems with vertigo that were sometimes damned severe and other times just disruptive and other times preventing me from sleeping (hard to sleep when you keep feeling like you are falling).  This got worse when I started commuting to work. 

Spring migraine season started which …

Just won't quit

Must be the beginning of migraine season or something.  My killer migraine hormonal episode is complete which the toradol shots partially helped kick.  The weekend therefore was relatively low in pain.  More like a migraine hangover than anything.  I had an annoying ache that was sharp and persistent but didn't really go anywhere from there. 

Unfortunately, I can't say the same for today.  It started off with that same persistent ache and then mid-day just jumped into full migraine mode.  Not that I didn't get a heads up, because I did. I started getting dopey, my eyes got wonky and then the migraine kicked in.  I just did not want to treat it because it is the weekend and as such I tend to want to resist medication to reserve for workdays... because I just Love to be in pain on days off.  Or maybe it is because I have to face the facts of having to use medication when I need it, which unfortunately is to muddle through work.  Unfortunately for me, this migraine is like t…

Can hypermobility increase pain in Juvenile Fibromyalgia syndrome?

Can hypermobility increase pain in Juvenile Fibromyalgia syndrome?

I had no idea about this but apparently they have a class of fibromyalgia call Juvenile Fibromyalgia... so they are actually looking at children and teenagers and diagnosing them properly.  Would have been nice had they done that when I was younger because I was one of those people with FM that had it at a very young age and so spent a lot of time going to the doctor for blood work and tests and no answers.  Took a long time to get my diagnsis and by then it was pretty bad.  So I'm glad they have finally figured that out... not everyone gets in their thirties or older and not everyone gets it after a trauma or illness... sometimes we have the symdrome and it just slowly gets worse over time.

I also have hypermobilty syndrome.. that I was diagnosed with early by the way.  And it is one of the things that is comorbid with FM, a lot of us are hypermobile and apparently about 40% of JFMers are.  I wonder if it is just …