Skip to main content

#MHAM #MHAMBC day 10 #migraines Twilight is the best light

Day 10: Our challenge prompt today is to study THIS PHOTO, then write on:

Dreaming of a world without Headache and Migraine; the thought of a life you control instead of your diagnosis. When you look at that image of arms outstretched on a moonlit night, what do you think?

You see that big old moon rising and the sun setting? That means I am alive. That means I can open my eyes without squinting. Go for a nice walk with my low level sunglasses on and feel the nice chill air on my skin. My time of day. Where my brain wakes up instead of settles down. The insomniacs time of day.

There is a certain amount of freedom in twilight that I do not have in the harsh peak time of day. I want to limit my movement in the peak time of the day. Everything about it will increase my pain. But at twilight things soften for me. The decree to which the very enviroment causes me pain is lessened substantially and I have more mobility. Unfortunately the rest of the world has decided the day is done for. I say, hey, I can get things done. They say, hey, the day is done. The curse of the insomniac.

The only problem with twilight is that it increases visual snow. It is surreal time. It is when the world because hazed by that field of static that is not quite as distorting during the day. It is just so much more noticeable in dimmer lighting.

But then, photophobia is so insane during the day. So there is that. I really welcome the decrease in that every day. Really welcome it with wide open arms. I hug the night. Sunlight is just photophobia, halos and sunglasses really.

 The photo makes me think of peace and darkness. Quiet and the time of day I have some time to myself. I could dream of a day where the day equals the night, but I have always been a night owl anyway so there is that, and I always do like the peace and quiet of that time of day. I just also happen to like the lessening of harsh light as well.

Twitter: nikki_Albert

Day #1 post “What would you do if your dream of a totally pain- and symptom-free life, came true?”
Day #2 post "Bed of Clouds poem to ponder"
Day #3 post "Recurrent dreams"
Day #4 post  "Still I Rise"
Day #5 post "Monsters"
Day #6 post "Ways to raise awareness."
Day #7 post "What I do for Awareness"
Day #8 post "Do not forget to live"
Day #9 post "What fear can teach us."

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Signs the pain is getting the best of you

100 Symptoms of Fibromyalgia

There was a site that had this and I had linked to it on Tumblr but it is gone. So I had to hunt down someone who found my post and posted the whole thing in a forum. Anyway it is around but I'm posting it here so I will not have to hunt it down to reference it. Now we all know the major symptoms are the wide-spread pain, but our pain isn't just muscle pain... it can be nerve types of pain as well, and the fatigue and the insomnia. And even among symptoms there are some far more frequent than others, but it should be said we have categories... like the cognitive dysfunction, which is a broad one that has more than one symptom and we often just say fibrofog. The insomnia... more than one sleeping disorder. So the list is interesting.

__ Fatigue, made worse by physical exertion or stress
__ Activity level decreased to less than 50% of pre-illness activity level
__ Recurrent flu-like illness
__ Sore throat
__ Hoarseness
__ Tender or swollen lymph nodes (glands), especiall…

When I say I am good

When people ask me how I am feeling 99% of the time I am lying. I often say 'not bad', because I feel it is slightly more honest than 'good' or 'fine'. Got sick of fine. Anyway, I lie for many reasons. 

I'm having a good pain day: They happen and I'll say that I'm good, fine, not bad. I even feel like I can accomplish great things... in moderation. In which case, relatively speaking, for Me I am not actually lying. This is a Good pain day, it is Not Bad for me and I am Fine with it. I just don't want to explain: I just don't want to explain how crappy I feel and in which way I mean. Because I am tired of it. I just want to deal with it, without having to discuss it, mention it or have any sympathy expressed about it. Because it can be complicated. It may be a migraine with specific symptoms. Maybe it is a FM flare though. Or both. And then I have to explain what it is because most people think my migraines are the main issue but I could be FM…