Skip to main content

New Year; Same old same old

Chronic illness to-do.png
Here is what I wrote about New Years Resolutions

We have to be careful about them because we have limited energy and our mood can be hit hard by the failure of too unrealistic goals. So small achievable goals are the way to go. But I have to say after the holidays I have what you can a mood let down. I enjoy the holidays and then there is always this New Year business... and really it is 'oh, another year of This' business. It is exhausting to think of another year. Maybe because I have such intense fatigue lately; anything is exhausting. I mean, New Years came in with a wicked migraine. It was like my brain was saying 'Welcome to the same old same old.'

I have goals in mind. And I hope to make them habits if I can just get around the depression and fatigue somewhat to manage to do things. Not to mention bad pain days, which seem to out number good pain days. Since I have been tracking my migraine days recently, yeah, bad pain days way outnumber good pain days. I haven't been tracking FM pain but that fluctuates like a wave. Always present but then surges higher for a few weeks and then recedes to baseline and then swells up again.

 So small goals... these are a massive deal to us. Each step is a freaking mountain climbed. Don't give yourself Mt. Everest here. Give yourself a small mountain and in four to six months assess your progress on that goal and adjust accordingly. Make it easier or harder. Depending on your progress.

Anyway, I don't feel well in the new year. I always feel a mood drop. Which statistically, by the way, is typical with depression so watch out for That. I am personally taking it a little easy as a result. Pain is high, mood is low. Not the time to be all on top of my goals for sure. More time to be on the self-care zone. Actually, more on the 'get out of bed, get dressed and eat zone'. I wish I could do something about fatigue because that is killer. Feel more like a zombie than anything.

Also, I should point out as a Canadian it is in the midst of the frigid winter here. Not exactly awesome for mood. Or, by the way, pain.

And if you are also feeling this holiday let down feeling I would recommend some self-care. I have been doing some reading and writing. The two things I do to improve my mood. We will settle into normal coping existence again. This is a normal feeling for people with depression to feel after the holidays. Maybe normal for everyone? No idea on that one. Maybe it is. I do know it is also high pain time of year as well. So we have to up our coping skills certainly.

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Signs the pain is getting the best of you

100 Symptoms of Fibromyalgia

There was a site that had this and I had linked to it on Tumblr but it is gone. So I had to hunt down someone who found my post and posted the whole thing in a forum. Anyway it is around but I'm posting it here so I will not have to hunt it down to reference it. Now we all know the major symptoms are the wide-spread pain, but our pain isn't just muscle pain... it can be nerve types of pain as well, and the fatigue and the insomnia. And even among symptoms there are some far more frequent than others, but it should be said we have categories... like the cognitive dysfunction, which is a broad one that has more than one symptom and we often just say fibrofog. The insomnia... more than one sleeping disorder. So the list is interesting.

__ Fatigue, made worse by physical exertion or stress
__ Activity level decreased to less than 50% of pre-illness activity level
__ Recurrent flu-like illness
__ Sore throat
__ Hoarseness
__ Tender or swollen lymph nodes (glands), especiall…

When I say I am good

When people ask me how I am feeling 99% of the time I am lying. I often say 'not bad', because I feel it is slightly more honest than 'good' or 'fine'. Got sick of fine. Anyway, I lie for many reasons. 

I'm having a good pain day: They happen and I'll say that I'm good, fine, not bad. I even feel like I can accomplish great things... in moderation. In which case, relatively speaking, for Me I am not actually lying. This is a Good pain day, it is Not Bad for me and I am Fine with it. I just don't want to explain: I just don't want to explain how crappy I feel and in which way I mean. Because I am tired of it. I just want to deal with it, without having to discuss it, mention it or have any sympathy expressed about it. Because it can be complicated. It may be a migraine with specific symptoms. Maybe it is a FM flare though. Or both. And then I have to explain what it is because most people think my migraines are the main issue but I could be FM…